The following was posted on an actual forum thread of which I was briefly part. It was in support of the FBI and the family Watchdog groups and all others who post links to the sex offender registries so parents and others can know if a sex offender lives around them. Most people applauded the registry and sites like this. Two women, however, and both with children condemned them. The following were the comments left by them, followed by my responses.
I am posting this here as an open letter to all who feel as these two women. I urge you to please consider my responses carefully, especially if you value your children. ~S~
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JANE DOE 1:
"Hello, just adding my 2 cents here, but I have to say, I completely dissagree with web site like that. I think that it give a false sense of security to know that the person down the street was convicted, SERVED his/her time & is now being asked to rejoin a sociaty that is completely unwilling to accept him/her. We all know that there are very bad people out there, some of them very close to/in our homes, so why not teach our children to had a sense of personal responibility and strength? Teach our babies to NOT be victims!
Please don't get me wrong, I work with Domestic & Sexual Violance Victims, I know that many sexual preditors will reoffend, btu I also know that if we only look at the guy down the street, we stop looking in our own living rooms, & we also make it harder for the offender to leave that life behind, & be a member of our sociaty as expected.
BB The Loving and often worried Mother of 2 beautiful Daughters"
MY REPLY:
Wow. How sad. For your daughters
JANE DOE 1:
" I'm not sure whats so sad for my daughters. They are very aware, and well adjusted girls, and they know how to take care of themselves! They also know that you can never judge a book by it's cover. And frankly, I think that a comment like "Wow, how sad for your daughters" is inflamitory! How judgmental!
I hope you have a peaceful day.
BB The loving Mother of very happy, safe & aware Daughters"
MY FINAL REPLY:
There is nothing inflammatory about that statement. Just an observation of how sad it is that your children have a mother who wants a child rapist living next door because it's the "christian thing to do" to forgive and forget. It is inflammatory to criticize and condemn parents who actually love their children and want to keep them safe.
It is sad that you condemn parents for wanting to know if child rapists and molesters live in their neighborhood.
It is sad that you condemn law enforcement for making sexual predators let their community know they are around.
It is sad that you think they can be rehabilitated when those of us who are actually in this field know first hand they cannot.
In order to be rehabilitated, they must first acknowledge that what they do is wrong. They consider themselves lovers of children and don't believe for a moment what they do is wrong. This is a fact. Not a crucifixion of the poor woe-is-me pervert who is constantly looking for his or her next victim. Most of us who have common sense know why a sexual predator would want to live next to a school or playground.
Oh, they may whine and cry to the cameras that they are sorry but it is all an act. See, they have a code. They have web sites and How-To books that guide them on how to behave in the public eye not only to gain access to children but also to get bleeding hearts to feel sorry for them and accept them back into society. Crying for the camera about how they just want to live a fruitful life and get better is a famous act of theirs.
They cannot and do not get rehabilitated.
Even chemical castration doesn't work. There have been subjects of this procedure who have been arrested and have admitted to raping with dildos, fingers, bottles, spoons, broom handles since they couldn't use their dicks.
Yes, it is sad that any child would have a parent who would rather give repeat offender child rapists access to their kids than to arm themselves with the knowledge that there is one in their area. It is appalling that a parent would rather not know to protect her delicate sensibilities and flippantly say, "Oh, my kids will be safe because they're smart." Do you realize how many SMART women and children are raped every day in this country? Smart has nothing to do with being the victim of rape. Especially for a child who can be easily overpowered by an adult.
Yes, it is sad that a parent would condemn law enforcement for offering websites to parents who love their children enough to not turn a blind eye to the dangerous world around them and want to keep them safe.
It is frustrating and disheartening for those of us who fight for the right to know when child rapists move into our neighborhoods to not only have to deal with the perverts who want to scope out our children, but to deal with bleeding hearts who refuse to face the facts and choose to give rights to the perverts over the children. Fortunately, though, there are more of us than the bleeding hearts. Someone needs to keep the kids safe, even if those parents won't.
I am terrified for your daughters. I really, honestly am. You think children should be able to just protect themselves? Gods.
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JANE DOE #2:
"This is a very good tool to help keep people informed, however I just want to add something that I don't think some people think of.....Did you know that some of these men are actually innocent of the crime they were "convicted" of but because of the courts long standing conviction rate of men when it comes to "he said , she said" they are convicted, sent to prison and when they get out still have to keep paying their dues to socieity for a crime they didn't commit? Right now if a woman says some man assulted her, the man is arrested and put in jail until he is proven innocent. And when people find out that there is a "convicted" offender for any crime living "down the street" they become like the Christians when they find out that there is a person who doesn't believe in their God living next to them. .....they are automatically devil worshipers who are going to come murder them in their sleep and take their children and cut them up to sacrafice to their demons. Sorry, it just burns me up when after someone has paid the dues that the court had put on them for a crime , they are still having new things added on long after they are released. Yes, there are some offenders that do go and repeat crimes, but the number is extremly small when you consider how many people who have served their time don't! Anyway, I just wanted to add my comment , I know most won't agree or even understand what I am saying, but , it is just my opinion and I do hope that by adding it I didn't offend anyone."
MY ONE AND FINAL REPLY:
I understand completely your worry in this. Unfortunately, there are people convicted of crimes who are innocent. I feel for them and I would never want to see an innocent person suffer for being labeled for a crime they didn't commit.
When it comes to sex crimes against children, however, and even rapes of adults, there are so many required procedures law enforcement and the DA must go through to even bring the charges because those are very serious allegations and the law knows what could happen if the court finds the person guilty. There are rape kits, DNA tests, witness interviews, interviews with the victim that are quite exhaustive and deeply personal, very detailed.
Don't forget that in this country, the victim is always treated as a liar by the defense team and is presented in court as such. Every single indiscretion by the victim, even those of an innocent child, are aired in court by the defense to get their client off as either completely innocent or as having been lured into the encounter by a willing participant - even in the cases of child rape this is done, and judges have dropped charges against child rapists who claim they were seduced by the child. There is a well documented case of a judge who called a 6 year old rape victim a "teasing little slut" who got what she asked for and let the man go.
Out of 1,000 convicted child sex offenders, I can guarantee you MAYBE 1 is actually innocent. Personally, I want to protect my child from the 999 offenders and hope that the 1 innocent man will behave as an innocent man, thereby, causing him no trouble.
Sites like this help parents by arming them with the knowledge of convicted offenders in their vicinity. So often there have been cases of teachers and coaches and girl/boy scout leaders raping, molesting, even murdering victims and afterwards the community screaming, "Why weren't we told about his record of child abuse? If we had only known, we wouldn't have put him near our children!"
These sites run by law enforcement and the law requiring these people to be registered are very good, positive things that are very much needed in our society. If they had this system in place when I was a child, almost every man in our neighborhood would have been registered and every single friend and I would never have been hurt by their ring. Our parents would leave us at their homes to babysit because these men were "pillars of the community" and never laid a finger on their own children/grandchildren. They had everyone fooled except for the kids they hurt, even to the point we were called liars and bad children for finally accusing them.
Let me ask you this: Would you rather know that your neighbor was a child rapist by this registry, or find out after he rapes a child? Is it better to protect that one man out of 1,000 guilty men or the children who are potential victims of the 999?
I understand your points and I very much agree that I would never want to see an innocent person persecuted for such a heinous offense. It is just so rare a thing, though, and acceptable to me that one innocent man must fight false charges rather than my child or any other suffer rape and molestation and the ramifications that last a lifetime.
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